Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Translation, please.

Last summer I went to a friend's wedding in Boise and finally got to spend some quality time with Maddie, the 11 year old daughter of my dear friend Jen. By "quality time" I mean that she had to be surgically removed from my ankles when it was time to call it a night. For some reason she has decided that I am the best thing since sliced bread; I guess because I am very much like her mom, only waaaay NICER.

So now that we are BFFs, Maddie and I e-mail back and forth every now and then, because, you know, actual LETTERS are soooo last decade. Below is the email I got from her this morning:

heey kate i cant belive ur going 2 ny im sooooooooooooooo jealous. in zkewl we r making center pieces and delivering them, then on the 12th we( the whooole 6th grade) r going to the mall 4 secret santa (hohoho) shopping 4 preasants 4 little or big kids!!!!!!!!!!!! it will be sooooooooooooo much fun :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)yes we have put /\ i luuuuuuuuv the smell 2!!! we got all messed /\ with the lights so we have 2 kinda sorta redo them soya 4 christmas break i especially want to chill but i want to have christmas reeeeeaaaaalllllyyyyy soooooooooooooooooooon wooooooooooooooooooooooooooohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo any ways im really x-ited 4 nye (new years eve) and nyd (new years daay) r'ent u?????? i just love playing with my c-mas preasants and my daddies side of the family all go to church and stay the untill midnight ( 11-12 ) its cool kuz my bff emma goes 2 our church 2 sooo we sit 2-gether and get all sleepy and stuff sooya its really fun

b t w (by the way) a.k.a. p.s. 17 days until c-mas and 23 days until nye aaaaand 24 days untill nyd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Seriously. What the hell? Am I completely old and out of touch, or is this kid speaking a foreign language? In fact, when I just ran a spell-check, my computer coughed a few times, started smoking from somewhere deep within and then melted into a puddle on the floor.


Heidi said...

my lord, i'm so terrified for the day when my children become teenagers (which is think happens around 3rd grade, now, yes?).

this is also partly why i'm thinking about unschooling them: how can we possibly think adults can predict what knowledge and skills kids should have when the world is changing so quickly? and when they are outpacing us in knowledge and skills so outrageously?


Maggie said...

I feel the same way reading this as I did when I attempted to read Trainspotting - turns out I'm really bad at reading things written in thick, incomprehensible dialect - like your email from one of the well known tween/teen tribe...

Robyn said...

I'm not sure what it says about me, but I understood the whole thing. I found it both slightly annoying and goofily charming, as I find most tween girls.

I DO have to take issue, however, with "zkewl"... and I hope they are not really replacing xmas with c-mas. That's just wrong.

Dee said...

Well, it terrified and reduced my computer to puddles too. When I tried to comment, it stalled , froze, failed to respond, and threatened to report to the powers that be. I had to tell it "don't send". Honestly !

Anyway, after, waiting a bit , I tricked it by whizzing past the email straight to the comments.

I understood a small part, the thing I didn't get was the thingy made with forward and backward slants. I don't even know how she made it.------good luck w/future correspondence.

Linda, aka "Lala" said...

Oh, Kate,... you are sooooo yesterdA. OMG!!! You are gonna get < behind in comp world if u don't keep /\!
er (eye roll)

robyn said...

Awesome, Linda. Thanks for the laugh!

Dee said...

If I turn my keyboard upside down, will that make the backward slash?

Fancy Schmancy said...

Scary nuf I totes nu evry ting she sez! OMG!