::Eddie Vedder::

Have I ever told you about the time I touched Eddie Vedder's ass? I don't think I have.

First, for my sister, who is OLD and doesn't know who EV is: he is the lead singer of the band Pearl Jam. They were HUGE when my friends and I were in college, and to us HE. WAS. GOD. Kind of like Paul McCartney was to you old farts. hee.

My college roommates were my best friends Jennifer and Christina. Jennifer and I had worshiped Eddie Vedder. We owned all their CDs of course, knew the words to every song and plastered our refrigerator with pictures of him. We searched the latest issue of Rolling Stone and Spin for new photos (this was back in the prehistoric days before the World Wide Web....jesus, this makes ME old.) Anyway, we knew everything about him: who he was dating, what his political beliefs were, that he'd had an abusive childhood, that he left home to become a beach-bum in Southern California and was asked by a fellow surfer to join some unknown Seattle band that needed a lead singer...you know, the kind of ridiculous trivia that obsessed young women tend to know about smokin' hot rock-stars.

Christina did not get our EV obsession. She did, however, just happen to be friends with some of Neil Young's sound technicians, and this came in very handy when we learned that Pearl Jam was on tour with Neil Young. A few years prior, she lived in the Bay area and frequented the same tavern in Half Moon Bay where Neil and his crew went to unwind after recording at his studio nearby. So Christina being Christina, she befriended these guys and stayed in touch after she moved to N. Idaho for college. When we found out that the tour would be coming to The Gorge, Christina not only scored free tickets to the show, she got us BACK STAGE PASSES. The Gorge is a really beautiful outdoor venue at a winery in central Washington, with the stage overlooking the Columbia River.

Part of the fun of attending a show at the Gorge is that there is on-site camping, so it's a big party before and after the show. So once we arrived, we set up our tents, popped open the wine and (Mom! Look over there! A bunny!) smoked some pot. Then, armed with our backstage passes, we headed to the show. We found Christina's friends and were invited onto one of Neil's tour buses for some more "pre-function" partying. Wandering around back stage, we saw Neil eating with his family under a big white tent, some of the guys from Mud Honey (another Seattle band) were hanging around drinking beer, and we listened as Blind Melon warmed up the crowd. When it was time for Pearl Jam to come on, Christina's friends (to whom I might have mentioned my love of Eddie Vedder) led us up to a small platform just a few feet above and to the left of the band. We watched their entire performance from backstage. It was incredible to have the band's view of the crowd, thousands and thousands of screaming fans dancing and singing along to every song. With just a few songs to go, I decided to get an even better view and climbed down off the platform and made my way to the actual stage, standing discreetly next to some large piece of equipment, up against the back wall. Finally, their performance ended, they said their goodbyes, put down their instruments and made their way toward the back of the stage. I realized I was standing right next to the ramp that they would be walking down to leave, and as each member made his way down off the stage, I simply fell in line directly behind Eddie Vedder. At that exact moment, I looked up toward the platform where Christina was standing (she hadn't even realized I'd left our perch for the real stage). We locked eyes, her jaw dropped open at the sight of me grinning as I walked off stage with the band, and that was all the encouragement I needed: I very subtly reached out and just barely touched Eddie Vedder's butt. He didn't even notice, or maybe he thought it was one of his band mates jostling him as they hurried off the stage. They went on their way and I went on mine, to hook up with a hysterically laughing and completely shocked Christina, who had witnessed the entire thing.

And that, my friends, is why I haven't washed my hands since 1993.

::drunk with power::

Remember awhile back when I mentioned that I would be writing a monthly column for one of my favorite blogs?

For some reason Whoorl thinks I will excel at making fun of people. Only this time it has nothing to do with people getting hurt! I get to make fun of, specifically, celebrities with bad hair. Whoohoo! So head on over (ha! head...hair get it?) to Hair Thursday to check out my first installment of "Celebrities: What Were They Thinking?"

Methow Valley

Aaaaah, I just got back from a short but very relaxing weekend in the Methow (pronounced Met-how) Valley in Washington state.

When Eric and I left Oregon, we looked into relocating in this area. There are two communities: Twisp and Winthrop. Both are very small and very charming. Many artists, musicians and authors call the area home, so it is full of our kind of people. In fact, when we were leaving yesterday, Anna and I saw two gentlemen, probably in their 60s, holding signs that said "Impeach Bush!!" and "No More War!" I love, love, LOVED it!!! Additionally, the area is just breathtakingly beautiful: huge, towering mountains and the gorgeous river running through the valley. But after living on the Oregon coast for 8 years, I had to admit that I couldn't live year-round in an area so remote: it's a 3.5 hour drive from Spokane on a good day, 5.5 from Seattle. They get a ton of snow in the winter, so it is very hard to even get OUT of the valley in the winter; the road to Seattle closes down for at least 4 months of the year due to snow and avalanche danger. It's a lovely place to visit, but I knew I would go bat-shit crazy living there after many years on the rainy, remote Oregon coast.

Anyway, Anna and I met up with my friend Nichole and her daughter who came over from Seattle, and they brought some friends. So there were 4 women and 4 kids; we all really enjoyed each other. There was great conversation in front of the crackling fire, some exploring along the river, wonderful food, soaking in the hot tub, reading, laughing and lots and lots coloring, painting, glitter and making shrinky-dinks.

We rented this amazingly funky, artsy, whimsical house on the Methow River that is owned by a Seattle film-maker. I want them to adopt me.

The house is a re purposed barn:

View of the Methow River from the kitchen window.

In the summer they have several tee pees on the property, and a river-rock swimming pool.

Outdoor swinging bed, on the porch. This is my dream.

Crazy art and whimsical details are everywhere you look, inside and out.

The "secret" passage-way was a big hit with the kiddos:

It rained most of the weekend, so the kids would get all bundled up, go outside and play, and then come back in and soak in the hot tub.

This is Syringa, Delaney and Anna. Notice that Delaney is wearing a "rain skirt". Because it is darn-near impossible to be a proper princess when you have to tuck your skirt into rain pants. So some genius Waldorf-mommy in Seattle invented "Rain Skirts". As they say, necessity is the mother of invention. Brilliant.

The farm next door had some horses and a couple of donkeys.

And a huge, lovable Golden named Honey Bear. Honey Bear LOVED the kids, and he loved to dig for mice. He would dig, dig, dig and then stick his entire head in the hole so that only his ears were resting on the ground. He'd snuffle and snort and then dig a new hole. He entertained us with this for a good 15 minutes. Finally Anna and I saw a terrified little field-mouse pop out of one of the holes and run for his life. Honey Bear was oblivious, still digging. He was a sweetie.

The second day the farmer came down and told us all about the animals and that he and his wife, a social-worker, are starting a animal-therapy group for families. He even let the kids ride on one of the donkeys.

There was even a trampoline. This place was heaven, for the kids AND the moms.

Can't wait to go back when the weather is a bit less soggy, and WITH my hubby.

cat eyes, baby

Ha! You guys are crackin' me UP with your opinions about my glasses. Jeebus, could you people BE any more contradictory??

For what it's worth, I love option B, the cat-eyes, and those are the ones the girls at the frame shop loved too. The first ones (A) we thought were nice enough but...eh...not so interesting. They thought the cat-eyes were much more FUN, like me, they said.

As for my husband, you may remember that somehow I managed to marry a man who does not share my love of all things retro. In fact, he pretty much loathes anything vaguely 1950s. So I knew he wasn't going to go for the cat-eyes. But do you know what that sweet, amazing man did?? He chose the cat-eyes because he knew right away that they would be MY favorites.

(Yes, as a matter of fact, he DOES have a brother: a cute, FUNNY, and SINGLE brother. The catch is you have to move to Boston. If you're interested, or know anyone who is, I can hook you up. I am sort of his un-official match-maker but frankly, I'm not doing my job AT ALL.)

So anyway, I still don't know WHAT the hell you all decided, but I'm going with B, baby.


And now for a complete change of subject:

Have you guys been reading The Pioneer Woman this week? If you know and read PW, you know that she and her family live on a huge cattle ranch in Oklahoma. They homeschool their four kids, who rise before dawn each day to saddle up their horses go work the cattle. They do this from the time they are 3 years old. Her blog is a fascinating look into ranch life, plus she's funny and smart and takes amazing photographs.

Well, this week she is sharing the stories and photographs from her husband (Marlboro Man, as she calls him) and their two daughters' trip to the Dominican Republic. The three of them travelled to the DR to meet the children their family have been sponsoring through a group called Compassion (you can click on that link to go to their page). You see those ads with beautiful but hungry-looking big-eyed children, asking you to "help a child in a third-world country", and I cynically wonder how much, if ANY, of the money actually goes toward making a difference in the lives of these children. So it is really cool to see Marlboro Man and his daughters getting to meet the actual children that they have been sponsoring and corresponding with.

I would very much like to do this with Anna; I think that would be a very powerful learning experience for her. If I knew that our money was actually helping, I would feel great about sending a check off each month. She and I could learn about the other country and the children write back and forth to each other. What a cool experience.


You MUST go see the photographs of their sweet strawberry-blond girls playing and swinging and laughing with these kids in the dusty villages of the Dominican Republic. It's beautiful.

::choices::

Ok, now we've managed to pick a new President (whoohoo!!), we can get on to the important decisions like helping me pick out new glasses. My vision has gotten worse and I think I'm going to have to break down and wear glasses all the time now. So I have to be really happy with them. I went to the fancy-pants frame store and tried on 8,642 pair and these two were the best. They let me take the frames home to get opinions.


So: A
It's hard to tell in the photo, but these are olive-green-ish.

or B:
These are tortoise-shell and more cat-eye.
Please ignore the fact that both pair are a bit crooked; apparently one of my ears is three inches higher than the other. Also, disregard frizzy hair. It's suddenly that time of year when you must moisturize 15 times a day or you begin to resemble a crone.

Anyway, what do you think, A or B? The girls at the frame store went bat-shit crazy over one of the options, also the one I like best. But I'm curious to see what YOU think.

As always, I reserve the right to blatantly ignore your vote and choose the ones I like best anyway. But thanks for playing!

Yes we did!!!

I'd like to direct my post today directly to a few of my family members who supported McCain. I am not going to gloat today, although obviously I am thrilled that Obama was elected. To my family members (mom, Elmer, Sarah), I love and respect you, and I know that your worst fear is that Obama is going to take the money that you work hard for and give it to the unemployed welfare mothers with 12 kids. That is not what electing Obama is or was about.

Look, even if McCain won, he'd have to raise taxes. That is the only way to get us out of this ridiculous, ugly mess that we're in: we've borrowed TRILLIONS of dollars from other countries to fight these wars, while things here at home have undeniably crumbled. There is simply NO OTHER WAY to dig us out of this hole.

There are cries of "Socialist!". To that I say: is Socialism really so bad? To have what you (and you and you) NEED, and then to help others so that they, too, may have what they need? Doesn't everyone in this great country of ours deserve food and clean water and shelter and medical care? If you say "But I earned this money! It's mine!" well then, I encourage you to take long hard look at a true Capitalist society: Mexico. There, the wealthy live in huge villas surrounded by walls while the "have nots" live on the streets like dogs, beg for food (because there are no social services to help them) and suffer horribly in a completely lawless society. There is no middle class in a true Capitalist society.

We are blessed to live in America where, if God forbid you lose your job, you can apply for unemployment insurance to help you get back on your feet. You can get Medicaid and Medicare. You can get food stamps. These social programs make it possible to feed and clothe and care for your family when you need it. It is easy, when we DON'T need those social services (EACH OF WHICH WAS CREATED BY DEMOCRATS, by the way) to think "Well, I work for MY money. They should too." But you don't realize how so many of us are just a paycheck or two away from NEEDING those services.

I remind you of the saying "there but for the grace of God go I."

I, for one, will never resent taking a portion of my MEAGER income and sharing it with people who have less than I do. If we all live by the golden rule, there WILL be enough to go around. We can, if we just remember to share, make this country the best country in the world.

Yes, we can.

end of the world

I blatently stole this video from my neice's blog, but damn, it's funny.

Fuckin' kangaroos.



PS. GO VOTE!!!!

(Unless you're my mother, in which case you can just go ahead and stay home. I'll vote for you. heh heh!)