Thursday, March 24, 2011

::Hiatus::

As you've probably guessed by now, SPP is on hiatus. I've just got nothin' to say that inspires a blog post: I haven't run into any parked cars lately, I haven't had to take a dump on the grounds of a church, and there's no political race inspiring me to rant. The inside of my brain is ridiculously pink and happy and full of unicorns and rainbows, and we all know there is nothing more boring than reading about how happy someone is. Snore.

So when the shit hits the fan (as I'm sure it will) or I do something to embarrass the crap out of myself (sometimes literally), I'll post then. Otherwise, you can find me on Facebook.

In the meantime, feel free to browse through some of my most popular/entertaining/embarrassing posts, listed over there on the left.

Friday, January 28, 2011

laughing till I cry

I just discovered "Damn You Autocorrect" and I seriously just had to let a call go to voicemail because I CANNOT. STOP. LAUGHING.










Hoooboy. I needed that today.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

30 years ago today...

...Bill Pogue, father/husband/friend/brother was killed along with his friend and coworker, Conley Elms. My sister Jodi has done 30 days of tributes to him, funny stories and pictures and notes and drawings...things to help us remember him and to teach the grandchildren who their grandpa was.



So many horrible things were said about him after he was murdered; that was the tactic of the defence attorneys: to "justify" his murder. It was sickening and infuriating and so wrong. Yes, he was a hard-ass as a Game Warden, but only because he cared so deeply about the conservation of wildlife. To those who knew and loved him, he was wickedly funny, a gifted artist and a teacher of all things wild. He taught us to pay attention when we went out into the woods: to listen to the wind, to identify birds, and to notice where deer had bedded down for the night. He was also prone to practical jokes and wild exaggerations.



I so, so wish he and Anna had known each other; she is so much like him: a wildly funny little nature-girl who always, always has a pencil in her hand, drawing. When we drive in the car, she notices the clouds and the trees and from the time she could point and talk, she has always been the first one to spot wildlife on our hikes.

Jake was the only grandchild dad met, and he was SO proud:




The above photo is of dad with his best friend Jerry. They were camping in the Jack's Creek area of S. Idaho, one of dad's favorite places. On the back of the photo, in dad's writing, is this quote:

"If there is a future for wild things, then it is the burden of those who have reached farther than me, to save them for the rest of us. It will be done by those whose convictions were forged in campfires."
-Bill Pogue

Dad, you made the world a better place. You are missed.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Ooooh nooooo

Like many people, we have a mouse problem this time of year. We (ie. David) has caulked and nailed and plugged holes with steel wool. The good news is they are no longer frolicing on our dishes and partying in the silverware drawer, because that? Made me want to burn the entire house down.

No, now they just scamper around on our kitchen counters. After finding banana after banana having been burrowed into and hollowed out (which, I admit, is sort of cute but still....eewww), we took to putting the bananas in the bread box. There is NOTHING left out on our counters that resembles food, and yet every morning, I find still mouse poo in the corners and behind the blender. Which causes me to go all Mommy Dearest with the Clorox cleaning products.

As you know, we live with a small, tyrannical animal-rights activist. We have been warned not to kill any mice in our attempts to discourage them from eating our food and, you know, leaving hanitvirus on our forks.

Which means, of course, that we just waited until she went to her dad's for the week before setting up our ammo. David had purchased some high-tech contraption that looks like a harmless black box that you put some dog food in and then, when they go in, basically shocks the shit out of them. I'm sure he researched the crap out of that thing before purchasing it but the fact is? It doesn't work. So I set out a couple of the good old-fashioned snap traps.

First morning: nothing.

And then? This morning....the trap had indeed been set off. But there was no dead mouse. Instead (oh I can hardly bring myself to even write this) there was a tiny pool of blood behind it.

Gulp.

That's right: I am WORSE than a mouse killer. I am a MOUSE MAMER.

Anna must never know of this. I threw that damn mouse trap in the garbage and will never use one again. And I'm going to buy some very tiny baindaids and a shot of whiskey and leave them on the counter when I go to bed tonight.

Sigh.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

It gets better

In response to the recent rash of gay-teen suicides, writer Dan Savage started the "It Gets Better" video project. It's such a simple, yet beautiful idea: gay men and women who made it through years of bullying and and pain and rejection and came out on the other side, tell their stories to encourage gay teens to stay strong and to stay alive, because it does get better. So many people, from musicians and actors to "regular" people and even President Obama have participated in this project, including this new video by some of the employees of Pixar:



Also, there is another blog you might want to check out. One of my best friends from high school, Mitch and I reconnected on Facebook after having lost touch for many (like 20) years. I was not at all surprised to learn, when we reconnected, that he is now living as an openly gay man; I'd suspected during our high school years in southern Idaho that he was gay, but understandably he was in denial to himself and the world at that time. What I was surprised about is that he is Mormon!! It seriously took me weeks to wrap my head around that fact. How could my gay, progressive, liberal friend be Mormon??? But according to him, he could no sooner choose to not be Mormon than he could choose not to be gay. Ok. I have to respect that. And even more so, I respect the fact that he refuses to hide who he is. He was won over the leaders of his stake (in San Fransisco, so of course they must be a bit more tolerant) and even teaches Sunday school.

The really wonderful part is that Mitch is very active in getting the Mormon leadership to change their stance on gay people so that others, like him, can live their authentic lives while pursuing their religious/spiritual beliefs. He has stood up and outed himself and demanded respect for who he is so that others can do the same. He has spoken out in front of many LDS congregations, from SF to Seattle, sharing this which he wrote. It is beautiful and powerful and thought-provoking. I am so, so proud of him!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

zzzzzzzzzzz....oh. Hi. Yeah, I'm awake. Are you??

Well, clearly I don't have much to write about lately. BUT! For those of you who know that I've been battling this...fatigue thing for the past 5-6 months, there is good news! I FEEL BETTER!! I FEEL NORMAL!! This is a huge relief because I was beginning to think that "exhausted" was my new normal.

I'm not sure what caused this shift in energy for me. Two things I've done differently in the past week or two: I've been running again and I can't tell you how much I needed that. It's a catch-22 when you don't have energy, because the last thing you want to do is exercise, but I know I feel better and more energetic when I do. So that's helping.

And I tried acupuncture. When we were in Boston recently a few of us were chatting and the topic of acupuncture came up. David's brother Jim has an awesome new girlfriend, and she mentioned that she had suffered from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome years ago, and the thing that finally cured her was acupuncture. Well I have made many, many visits to my conventional doctor, my naturopath, and a pulmnologist over the past several months, with NO improvement, so I figured trying acupuncture was worth a shot. The guy I went to is also a practitioner of Chinese Medicine (which I guess goes without saying for an acupuncturist) and in addition to the poking, he gave me some Chinese herbs.

So I don't know if it's the running, or the acupuncture or the herbs or a combination of the three, but I AM SO BACK, BABY!! It feels GREAT to feel great again.

Look out world, I'm ready to kick some ass.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

::doing the right thing isn't always easy::

Remember how a couple of weeks ago I wrote about how I was determined to someday get my daughter a horse? Yeah, well, said child has an uncanny ability to recognize when my resolve is weakening. So somehow it went from "Honey, I know that you want a horse more than anything in the world and I want to make that happen for you someday" to "We might buy a horse this weekend!" I know! Jeezus, between my impulsiveness and her ability to pounce on an opportunity, it's a miracle we didn't run out and buy an entire horse ranch while David was out of town all week. For one thing, she and I went to go see "Secretariat" and I got all "Nobody is going to tell me I can't get my daughter a horse!"

Well, nobody except for my calm, reasonable and maddeningly rational husband. And he didn't exactly say "no", although I think the word "divorce" might have been bandied about. Actually, he gently and calmly reminded me that buying a horse for a ten year old child is not a great idea IF you are trying to raise a child to grow up to be a productive member of society who understands that one must WORK for what she wants.

Then I talked to Kami, the gal from whom we currently lease a horse and my go-to gal for all horse-related questions. She told me that she thought it would be best to wait, because the rider that Anna is now is not the same as the rider she will be in a couple of years. So if we bought a horse to suit Anna's needs and abilities now, in 2-3 years we'd be looking to replace it with, say, a barrel-racer or whatever.

Somewhat coincidentally (or maybe not) my friend Jennifer mentioned in an email how her first-born child is driving her mad because he is lazy and doesn't want to have to work for anything. In fact, he can't be bothered to get his driver's license because it's "too hard" and too much work. That does sound a lot like a certain 10 year old I know. And I'm smart enough (barely) to know that we want to nip that behavior in the bud right now.

So yeah. I knew that I had to go home after work and break my daughter's heart, because I am a BIG FAT IMPULSIVE DUMB SHIT who got her hopes up and basically said to her "Nobody is going to tell us what to do! Let's go buy a horse!"

As soon as I got home, I sat her down and had the talk. I explained it all to her, why it was important to wait, both Kami's argument that she will grow and change as a rider a lot in the next couple of years, and also how I realized (without implicating Davey as the bad guy) that one of my most important jobs as a parent is to teach her the value of working toward something. How it will actually be a lot more satisfying for her to earn it and she'll appreciate that lesson later in life....blah blah blah.

And then the crying and wailing and sobbing and thrashing and gnashing of teeth commenced. She was, as expected, disappointed and heartbroken and I felt like the worst. parent. ever. I knew I was doing the right thing, I was just so mad at myself for getting her hopes up. I held her for awhile while she cried and then she wanted me to go away. At one point I checked on her and she had pulled the hide-away bed out and was under it, crying and "working on something". I figured it was a note of the "I'm running away from home" sort, but I should have known better. This kid expresses herself through drawing. Eventually she came out of the room with a smirk on her face and handed me this:


(in case you can't read that, it says: "No! Not til you're 122! Oh wait you'll be dead by then. Did I mention I lied? Sucks for u.")

Yeah. OUCH.

For a split second I was devastated, but then I couldn't help but burst out laughing. This kid knows how to WORK it, doesn't she?

I went in and said "So this is how you see me, with glowing red eyes and big fangs?"

"AND A BIG NOSE", she made sure to point out.

Then we laughed and hugged and she was all better.

Why didn't anyone TELL me parenting was so hard? I HATE having to be the grown-up. Luckily I have a pretty great kid, with a big, beautiful, forgiving heart. Sigh.