I'm way too old for this

Last night I went out with my friend Sarah. Just a nice little civilized glass of wine while watching live music outside the Rocket Market. I love Sarah, but I think she slipped some quaaludes or Rohipnol or something in my wine because I vaguely remember shouting out to the cute lesbian singer and then riding my bike home (more like careening) and barely missing a parked car. And while I was sleeping, a small rodent crawled into my mouth and died and someone put tiny socks on all my teeth.

Here. Look at these pretty pictures I took on my drive home from work yesterday.